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4 T~E PolEMic Square Pegs hammered out by John Kissane_ Insomnia.Fever.Tremors.Nausea.Pain,deepsome- where. And encir\:ling all of it, running through your head like an endlessly repeating children's song, the Siren-call of th~ fix that you've been aching for. The Polemic is the needle, oh bright, wonderful needle, bringing to you that heroin-sweet liquid of John Kissane's words. God, the rush: it's like coming home again. · I'm back for one last semester (God willing and the creeks don't rise), and Phat Daddy J's going to use his inimitable arrogance, irascibility, and fabled vocabulary . to hit your vein. All right, fine, okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating just a tad. But come on: I'm a nineteen-year-old guy; we're supposed to have inflated self-images. Nothing wrong with using an accepted stereotype to excuse failings, right?_ · . Wrong, and that's what this column is about, in a way. Yep, that old dead horse of nonconformity. You know, I shouldn't have to write a column about this. I got the message back in 10th grade, reading Emerson. I ain't exactly the smartest Hydrox in the box, but I get it. I don't know what the hell's up with some of you·people. It's an obvious point, like "racism is bad." Well, whatever. . Maybe I can't say new things about nonconformity, but maybe I can at least state t]:te case for it in new ways. "If you don't rate, just overcompensate," the band Offspring tells us on the song "Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)" It's about a white guy who, lacking self-esteem, latches on to the most superficial elements of stereotypi- . cal young black guys. That's an 'attempt to conform. Or an Uncle Tom, some black guy trying to be whiter than Martha Stewart; that's conformity too. Con- versely, the black who tries to speak in Ebonics, that "language"of the grammatically-challenged, so as not to be called an Uncle Tom, is also a conformist. I'm talking about the Catholic atheist who goes to · church every Sunday to be seen. I'm talking about_ the Jew who used to go to Temple weekly but now goes to a Christian place so as to fit in with the other members of his gated community.· I'm talking about the lesbian who fantasizes about women but refuses to act on her nature because her friends hate "queers." I'm talking about the German who, in the second World War, vocally sup- . ported Nazism but in his heart despised it. Nonconformity isn't about being weird for weird's sake; that's jus.t another form of conformity.John Kissane doing nude cartwheels in Besser Tech is not taking a stand against conformity, it's just scary. Nonconformity means being true to the best part of your nature. It's about having the integrity to maintain your individuality, no matter the consequences. It goes from something as small as telling your best friend, who loves Independence Day, that you think the movie's stupid and meretricious to something as large as refusing to give names to l:):UAC, that anti-communism search-and-de- stroy organization of days past. · Now, there are certain elements of our natures that shouldn't be exercised in everyday life. If something drives you to take an ax to the head of any person you encounter, you should check that impulse. It hurts me to write this, but it's wrong to kill r_andom, something- possiqly-approaching-innocent people. Of course, if you run into 9- specific, guilty person, let fly. · If you're friends with a smug, self-indulgent colum- nist who spouts off every paper with irritatingly smug statements, tell him his stuff sucks and kick him in the kidney. Of course, this is just hypothetical; you probably don't know any columnists like that. Show the world your tme colors. If someone doesn't like you, it's either because he's dumb_ or you are. Either way, it's good to find• out in the beginning, 'cause in the long run, there aren't secrets. Ev~rything comes out one way or another. So let this column be for.you .. .let it be ... hmm ... oh, I've got it! Let this column be a psychological laxative; flushing from your system the barriers and facades · you've constructed. Tha_t metaphor was an exercise in nonconformity. Who else would come up with th~t one? Pure John Kissane, baby; pure John Kissane. . 9{fJrth£rn ENTERTAiNMENT FEbRUARY 2, 1999 . . Ch~istmas all year . long Bv GINGER DA VIS GUEST WRITER Dear Santa, Now ·that Christmas has come and gone, presents have been returned, and cards and letters from people who really care (but only enough to write once a year) have been pitched along with the tinsel .and tree, I need to talk to you about Christmas. of • ., 1'. \ ' . . -~ ._;( V ~ f; Perhaps you agree with me that we are being exploited by this well- intentioned holiday. This is probably evident from the glowing plastic like- ness of you, and the trendy white ·reindeer that litter yards across the na- tion (confession: Santa, I'd like nothing better than to gather up all the white metal reindeer in town and hang then from the same sign that the little deer in the "Big Buck Contest" are hung from). Christmas has turned into a well- wrapped guilt trip. Writing people because, God forbid, they might send you a card after you put them on the drop list, donatj,ng pocket change to charities you usually ignore, calling relatives you heard from since--well, last Christmas--and choking down the dreaqed fruitcake. So this year, I have a rather un- usual request. It may sound naive and overly-optimistic (I know, optimism! From me, of all people!), but here goes. I want to live in a world where this holiday isn't needed because you call and write loved ones all year long .. Where you fill y,our socks with candy and leave them for family members for no reason at all. When there are no bell- ringers in December, because we donate money all year round. Where fruitcake is outlawed and big family - dinners are a regular occurrence. I realize this is a lot to ask, espe- cially since it would put you back on the job market (and at your age, it · would be tough), but please think about it. And perhaps, some figgie pudding, and a cup of world peace while you're at it? · Chine-se culture at ACC BvJAMIN TREV ARRO · STAFF WRITER A film series called "A Reflection on Chinese Culture" is being offered this semester by the Association of Lifelong Learners and the ACC Student Senate. Three films will be offered and all are free and open to the pubUc. The three films, To Live, 1 (January 19), Pushing Hands, (February 2), and Eat Drink Man Woman, (February 16), are made by Chinese directors and actors. "One point two billion people have a very large economic impact on the rest of the world. " MattDunckel ACC instructor standing, a way of reflecting one's own situation by observ- ing another's," Dunckel said. "One point two billion people have a very large eco- nomic impact on the rest of the world," he added. The first film in the se- ries, To Live, was the dramatic life story of a man named Fugui and his family against the po- litical backdrop of the Com- munist takeover of the 1940s. The audience sees how the po- litical strife of the '40s, '50s and '60s affects the everyday lives of the working-class towns- people. The citizens gave their hearts, souls and lives to Chair- man Mao, yet they always seem to suffer regardless of who's ruling them, whether it's· the Reds or the Nationalists. The movie is subtitled. The dialogue is sparse, easy to understand, and the actors play their characters from the heart. You never feel as if you're merely "just watch- ing a movie;" it's more like watching scenes from real life, experiencing a friend's tri- umphs and torments. The films are highly rec- ommended, whether you're a foreign culture buff or j"!,lst a film addict; they work on both political and personal levels. , Sharp Metal Objects by Jeff Williams Vanilla Ice "Hard to Swallow" Republic ***** Think back ... back to Junior High School. Do the words "Ice, i_ce baby" jog any memories? If they do, · well here is a_blast from the past, sort of. Vanilla Ice, an overnight sensation with his single "Ice, Ice Baby," went against the grain in the early 90s by being a white rapper in a genre dominated by black . men. But just as quickly ·as he gained popularity, his music became cliched and he faded into history. Now the Ice Man is back with "Hard to Swallow." This is not the Ice from the good old days though; this is a very angry Ice Man. His lyrics are backed by heavy guitars reminiscent.of Korn or Limp Bizkit. The album was even produced by Ross Robinson who has worked with Korn and Limp Bizkit in the past. While the lyrics may be totally different than.Ice's old stuff, that doesn't necessarily mean that they are any better. Aside from his rants about his childhood on "Scars" and the remake of "Ice, Ice Baby" (now titled "Too Cold") there are few high points on this album. He sings mostly about getting high and "-----ing the industry." Bottom line: The guitars may be Korn, the lyrics may l?e screamed, but this is still just a white boy rapping ... badly. Also notable: "Psycho: Music From and Inspired by the Motion Picture" Geffen ***** Includes songs featured in the movie by Danny Elfman and also includes songs by Rob Zombie, Pet Shop Boys, and Girls Against Boys. After viewing, the audi- ence takes part in a discussion on the films and culture with Dr. Bart Boyer, ACC English instructor, and Matt Dunckel, ACC Social Science instructor. "I think with a greater aware- ness of a culture ]?eyond our own, there comes an under- All presentations begin at 7:30 1---~---------------------- p.m. at NRC 101 . 'Ezyosure · Photo di eustom '3raming OV\ ChiV\ese Life aV\d C1Alt1A~e 'Ifie £.,aw Office of Mark John Hunter ':Inside "Che Drug Store 2236 US 23 South Alpena, MI 49707 Ph. (517) 354-2171 Fax (517) 356-6606 PHOTO PROCESSING- WITH NEXT DAY SINGLE PRINTS ';) "Eat, _Dt'ink, Man, Wom,;;in" Febt'u.a>"}:' 2 & 16 NRC101 7:30 p.m. (jenera[ ~r_actice of Law (517) 356-3171 Hours: Noon to 5p.m. Monday thru Friday 11F'IVE STAR" QUALITY SERVICE AWARC .DEALER,· LOUIS MDTDR SALES, INC. '$~ ~ ~~ 44ilC8 19.lfr· B32 WEST CHISHOLM BT.AEICT PHONE 1117•:154•4154 ALPENA, MICHIGAN• ~9707