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2 The Polemic Editori'al November 2000 .... Generation of kissing rears _. CtIANDA WEKWERT - · Contributing Writer the swimsuit compet1t10n. whichever clone has • the Personally, I'm glad that part 'better smile and prettiest eyes of the contest is left out. gets the vote. Politics 1s a dying There are a number of Politicians are a breed •. rreligion. Corrupt politicians reasons people don't vote apart, destined forever to be _ .. _stand at the pulpit, preaching· anymore. The primary cast as older, pot-bellied, .·, ro empty pews. The era of reason: they don't care. And, balding or graying, sniveling, •,r~issing babies is over; ours is if it doesn't directly concern shrewd, lying, empty-eyed ... _the generation of kissing t?em, why should the7 take givers of faith; planting the rear's. time out to vote? seed in a different spot I think some of the best Which leads directly to maybe, but if and after he/she entertainment this time of another reason: they're too is re-elected, sitting back and > ·year, every four years, is the busy. And many people don't watching it fade away again. · 'presidential debates. Candi- vote because they don't think And who, by any stretch -' :dates talk circles around they can make a difference of the imagination, is allowed · 'themselves and their with one vote. Despite all the to choose the candidates? I opponents, minutes upon "well, in this case, one vote mean, anyone with any hours on end without really really did make a difference" common sense would choose saying anything at all. scenarios you paint, what are people with likewise abilities. .. Mediator: "Why would the odds? How can one vote Somewhere · out there, a -~::ypu make a better president?" make a difference if we really group of hopelessly bored Candidate: "I totally don't vote for the president individuals, or terminally .agree." ourselves? insane inmates, make a long " , The whole scene reminds I mean, a whole other' list of everyont; they've ever ' :me . of a Miss America group of nameless· indi- heard of on television or read _ . .Pageant. All that's missing is victuals vote for the seat, and about m any magazines, including Charles Manson, Dick VanDyke, Kathy Lee Gi_ifford, and the Marlboro Man. Then they flip a coin to see who should run and for what office. And what if an ordinary person wanted such a coveted seat as the presidency? Is there some small-print rule that states one must be related to a former president, or have worked under one? If so, watch out, I can see a certain former intern on the horizon. And after that rule, is there another one, . in two- point type, that states all candidates must sell their soul to a pre-approved . advisory board on lease from a personality-challenged Hell? Interesting fact from a fun political history: in almost every case, the taller candidate gets the vote. Pre- approved points of view aside, the taller one is simply less weak and feeble than his/her vertically challenged opponent. In this case, size does matter. From my experience, candidates say more by keeping their mouths shut than when they do finally open them to utter a few useless monosyllables. Example from the pres- idential debates: Mediator: "What is your foreign policy for military action?" Candidate: "Uh huh, that's right." In truth, he has no plan for action. If the time comes for him to act his part, he speed dials his old weed or war buddies from college to roll the die on who to head up his new foreign actions advisory council. On any real issues such as abortion or the unsure future of Social Security, the candidate is brainwashed for days on end to evade the question and talk circles around it until time is called. Penalty for those who show any form of emotion or mental preference is watching the same episode of Gilligan's Island for three days straight. Which, I am sure, would drive _just about anyone crazy. For his/her next job, that candidate can be a dice roller for the next election. Or he/she can always put in an application to the Person- ality-Challenged Advisory Board. Politics in America is in a downward spiral. A dirty taboo with no clean-slate relief in sight, politicians strive for election in a non- voting society. As for myself, I' 11 trip over to the voting booths and utilize the write-in ballot. Lumberjack voices: Who do you hope wins the election? Chris ~line l . ~· te Spl'tt .fi;leathe1c Cotter Lisa Budnik "Some girl in my 1c-'i.ence ~ class" "'I d just as soon it be Ralph • t t vin... next "I'm voting]or George Bush. I just think he would do the job better. I don't really like Al Gore that much. " "I think Al Gore. I don 't watch TV so I don't really follow political stands right N der. But a vote for Nader is a vote for Bush so I'm going to have to vote for Gore. " time Hilary Clinton will be running for the Democrats. " now. " •Financial aid needs reform, Perspective .J.{ICHELLE SIELAND :·c;p-Editor/Staff Writer Fi.rst of a two-part 'column · what never was and never win be. Whenever the people are well-informed, they can be trusted with (heir own "If a nation seeks to be government. " ignorant and free it expects --Thomas Jefferson to The Polemic CONTRIBUTORS \ C 0-E D ITORS JOCELYN HASKE & RICHELLE SIELAND 1 STAFF WRITERS Laura Parks Roxane Snyder Victor Kahn Becky Schmidt Alicia Wells Wendy Williams Dana Heitz Ryan Spaulding Megan Fletcher Shawna Thompson Tina Williams Matt Franklin ADVISOR Sue Grulke The Polemic is published on the first Tuesday of October, November, December, February, March, April and May. As an independent student public- ation, opinions expressed are strict! y those of the writer and not endorsed by Alpena Community College or the entire Polemic staff. Signed contributiOf\6 are - welcome, although we reserve the right to edit or reject material. Questions, concerns or contributions can be dropped off at Polemic Offce, BTC 106 or call us at 356-9021, Ext. 264. Mail correspondence to: The Polemic, Alpena Community College, l(J66 Johnson Street, Alpena, MI 49707. ' 'Contact us via e-mail: polemic8@netscaQe.net Dr. Price, 1789. I remember standing_ m the cashier line at Northwestern Michigan College in Traverse City. As I glanced at my receipt an unnerving shrill of anxiety raced through me. I didn' have enough money for m classes. My dad assume most of my college would be paid for through financial aid. He wrote out a check for $6,000 to cover the rest of my bill. Due to· lack of communication and information, I was forced to l I I \ I ,. ,. •• ' \ i I - ' accept a hard lesson in my life. Money is one of the most important reasons that I have not finished college yet. I am still learning to understand the system and how it works. This could be an important political issue for financial aid reform. The present system is backwards. Dr. Michael T. Nettles, is a higher education professor at U of M. His article 'Pursuing Broader Participation and Greater Benefit from Federal College Student Financial Aid' looks at the history of the system' and some interesting statistics. The rising cost of post secondary education has increased more than student income and the packages of federal and state assistance. School costs 90% more than By Dana Heitz ,JI., ,, •• •• I ~ ... "" ~ SPAGHETTI IN JAIL l ~ t -·' it did in 1980. Financial aid and the criteria to afford it are pays for less. Financial grant two different things. in aid awards will pay less . Another area of concern than 23% of college costs. 1s student withdrawal from More college students are college for the financial aid dependent on the government system and for the taxpayer. to pay for schooling and are An amazing point is that a constrained by an unequal figure for college drop out balance of grants and loans. rates is not known but The amount of debt that - estimated high. This raises students have accumu_lated is questions about the system of confounding. But if you how the money is distributed desire the life that an and why student withdrawal education may bring, that is is not easily calculated. just the way it is -like it or Loans must be repaid not. Debt has become a -after the grace period. But if necessity m our consumer financial aid is in the form of economy. a grant it may not have to be Federal aid programs are repaid. This depends on the possible through the Title IV policies set between federal, higher education act of 1965. state and the local school. The idea behind Title 4 is to New laws are changing the help every student in policies for financial aid and America have the opportunity students who withdraw. to attend college. But as most of us know this opportunity See FINANCIAL, Page 3 •trey the Bu .. )8" By Dana Heitz • 9e~ , sesame seeds, Jeffrey the Burger flees in